just some thoughts (again!)

so, i just came back from watching the movie, "Eastern Promise". i liked it. although i would not recommend it or encourage many to see it, i liked it because it showed the rawness of life. how there's hard times, good times, and sometimes it's even hard to see who's on which side... and if it even matters in the end. so much of the time we "pick sides". i've seen it many times. we'll stand on a problem, or state of opinion until we get tired of being the "king of the castle" on that problem and switch to something else that matters more. it's like we've become detached. detached from really caring about things and become opinionated to make us look like we care about something. i've just seen so many people say that "starvation should end" and yet committing gluttony (myself included), others say, "child labour should be banned" and yet the "designer labels" which they associate themselves with support the very thing. we shout until we're blue in the face. sometimes i just wish that we would loose our voice, so we'd think more and then hopefully do things out of a good heart.

i'm not sure if what i'm writing makes much sense, and i know that this blog can seem more overwhelming then helpful or informative at times, but the fact is that these are the passions on my heart. these are the thoughts i have. and, although i am not physically there with many of you, i want to be somewhat connected on a deeper level then, "this is what i did today". 'cause in the end what would you remember, what my day looks like or interesting ideas? i say interesting 'cause i'm not taking the stance of "having it all together"... 'cause that would be a lie. i don't. i cry. i have hard days. and some days i even think of coming home. it's hard... but that doesn't mean that we stop. it means that we allow Christ to keep on going. i know that there's a lot of people whom feel that way. stressed. burnt out. ready to give up. trying to fight the lonely feeling. and, i just want to say that we're not alone. there's many of us trying to follow Christ with our hearts. having tremendous joy along with much sorrow. realizing needs of others, and yet struggling to know our place amidst the suffering. so, that's why i spend more time writing thoughts, ideas and passions... to show that i care, and that individuals matter (wealthy or poor... we're all a little taste of Christ, even if it's hard to fathom)